Sunday, November 28, 2010

You Should Have Retired Last Year

The all-time leader in interceptions as well as touchdowns thrown goes to Brett Favre. Brett is the only person I know that won't retire, even when his body is telling him everyday that its about that time. I know he had a good season last year and he doesn't want to end his career by throwing an interception, but Favre thats your trademark. This is the only quarterback I know that throws a pick as the last pass every time as he tries to retire from the NFL. But hey what do you expect from the all-time leader in most interception thrown in a career. Nevertheless he had a good run from all the wins, winning a super bowl so long ago, oh and you cant forget that he is still adding on to the streak of most consecutive starts by a quarterback. This man could have broken every bone in his body and he would have the organization cart him out to the field to take the first snap, just so his streak wouldn't end. Brett in all the good things you have done in your career, one of the worst things you could have done was to come back this year. Were just past thanksgiving and your team is already out of the race for the playoffs. Sorry to say, but this season was an utter disaster. But hey at least try to not throw an interception as your last pass or we might see you again wearing that purple jersey in 2011. I pray that doesn't happen! Oh Brett I have an announcement for you, welcome to the club of Successful Failures we saved you a seat right in the front.


1095 Days In Prison Is NO Joke

What would go through your mind if you was told that you would have to serve 3 years in prison. You would probably be thinking my life is over. Well in Wesley Snipes case his career has been washed up and over. So when the judged sentenced him to 3 years of prison he probably was wondering what else is new. We all know Mr. Snipes from the Blade movie series but after that was over and dried up, I didn't hear not even a whisper from him. I wonder what he was busy doing in his spare time but we all know he was filing his taxes. Mr. Snipes is being charged with tax evasion, with that being his biggest problem of the moment he better also figure out how to not drop the soap in the shower. But don't worry he has 1095 days to get right. With the lack of production from him in recent years, being pronounced to go to prison, and possibly being on the verge of going bankrupt; this makes Mr. Wesley Snipes a perfect candidate of being a successful Failure.


What Happened To Houston And I'm Not Talking About The City

Okay now here is an example of when the good life goes bad. Whitney Houston was an R&B singer and actress and she was way beyond average. Her first album was the best female selling album of all time when it was released and her second album was the first album to be number one on the billboards 200 chart. But all that means nothing because her life took turn or shall I see sniff for the worst. Like most people she got married and that was a wrap for her life. Marrying Bobby Brown had to be the dumber then putting bleach in colored clothes. I don't know what she was thinking, maybe he possessed her or maybe he had a voodoo doll controlling her actions. Whatever it was it was probably the worst decision of her life. From the marriage came the drugs and from the drugs came the downfall of her successful life. I wonder how Bobby feels about ruining her life?? He probably doesn't care, why would he it isn't his life. Oh well Whitney I guess you can have all the talent in the world and still manage to mess up your life. I guess thats what makes us human. Don't give up Whitney, a comeback isn't impossible for a 47 year old lady or maybe it is. Well who cares because it still makes you a Successful Failure.


I Think Lindsay Has Moved On To Sniffing Crayons

Somebody help me, I cant seem to find the Lindsay Lohan from the movie Parent Trap. Instead I found this Lohan who cant seem to stay out of the drug rehab centers. I can't even deny it, I used to watch Parent Trap all the time and every time I thought of Ms. Lohan, I would think of that move. Now every time I think of Lindsay Lohan I think of her being a druggie. How do u go from starring in countless films and making good music to been looked at as the girl who can't stop using her nose to snort drugs and always has a bottle of liquor in her hand. I guess the famous life isn't for everyone. But if I could ask Lindsay a question it would be why she keeps going to rehab when she knows she doesn't want to quit anytime soon. Maybe being a teen star has to much pressure. I mean just look at life of the Olsen Twins and Macaulay Culkin, it isn't any better then Lindsay's. Welp I know a good spot where Lindsay Lohan fits in, perfectly, even with her drug problem and thats in being a Successful Failure.


I Wont Even Stay At The Hilton Hotel Because Of The Name

We all know about the sexy slender blond chick that had her on reality television show called the simple life. I guess you could say that where her success came from because I had no idea who she was until that show. Okay enough about her crappy show and on to the good stuff. Paris Hilton was a spoiled rich girl that females wanted to be. (Emphasizes on Wanted!). But I guess being rich, famous, and Hot (as she would always say) gets kind of boring. She had to bring more popularity to her self with the sex tape. Yea I watched it and In my opinion it was overrated. That taped deserved a B for Bullshit. but hey people still love Paris.  She even spent some time in prison for DUI. I guess she is just the luckiest person in the world to only spend 45 days in prison for violating her probation. Any normal person that would have been a year or more sentence. I guess the sex tape helped lessen the charge. We all cant forget that she starred in the movie called The Hottie and The Nottie. In my opinion that had to be WORST movie I have ever seen and im sure many other will agree with me. Oh lastly how about the sidekick leak of all the contents in her phone, which lead to numbers being exposed on the internet. If that doesn't make her a successful failure i do not  know what does, even though she is more of a failure because she was never that successful.


The Career That Died From Fallen Spears

Everybody knows the once pop queen, from her lyrics to her style. Now we all know Brittany Spears as being the washed up and bald-headed female that miserably failed at making a comeback at her career. Looking back at her career, Brittany Spears was the queen of music. Selling over 100 million records and even winning an American Grammy award. To bad all that means nothing because of the image she has now. Spears has had one of the worst comeback in Pop history and it goes hand in hand with her personal life. How do you lose custody of your children when your rich?? Come on now Brittany, I know life is tough but losing custody of your children is almost as bad as.... oh wait cutting your hair off. I still do not understand the point of going to that extreme to avoid a drug test. I guess this genius never heard of urine sample. But if cutting off your hair was the result of a nervous breakdown then she is in the right blog. Its a shame that you could go from selling millions of records to being the tatted up, bald-headed, childless, fan-less, Brittany Spears. I guess the enemies who threw those spears at her career had perfect aim because it died right along with her fan base. Oh well, its nothing wrong with being a successful failure, at least you had some success.



It's Okay To Cry Gator Nation

First off I would like to apologize for the ass whooping that FSU dealt to your team. So one question for you Gators, was the season a disappointment or what? Ha of course it was! How do you go from losing one game last season that cost you from playing in the BCS title game. To this year, where you all wont even being able to play in SEC conference game. You could put the blame on the teams' effort, the coaches, or just lack of preparation. Some may even say its Tim Tebow fault. Hey all I can say is that all things must come to an end and with looking back at this season, Gator Nation should be glad that disaster is over. Nevertheless Gator fans there is always next season, hopefully it will be better then it was this year. But in my opinion its probably going to end up being worse, A LOT worse. While Seminoles and I ate gator tail for dinner last night and started to prepare for the ACC championship game, we thought we should let the Gators and Gator Nation know that no matter how Successful you are, you will all still be Failures.


Tiger Your Better Off Living In The Woods

My Guess even having the name Tiger Woods would turn anybody's brighten day into a slump. I'd rather be stung by a whole bee hive of bee's, then having to walk on the golf course under the name of Tiger Woods. Mr. Woods went from being number one in the world of golf to being nothing more then a bag of garbage that stinks up everyone's house. In my opinion, this guy must have the lowest self-esteem and luck in the world. How would you feel going into a competition trying to hit a little white ball no bigger then a fist, after losing your wife, kids, fans, friends, money, endorsements, the number 1 rank in the world, and the stoke that made you who you are today? You would probably feel like shit every single morning and hope that this nightmare will end with every breath that you take. But hey at least you had a good run while it lasted. Who can say that they that they won 71 PGA tour events, won 14 majors, and cheated on their wife with more then 20 females? Oh yea only Tiger Woods. Its okay everyone makes mistakes, thats exactly why your a Successful Failure.


Thursday, November 18, 2010

Is It Michael Vick Or Still The Dog Killer

Last time I checked Mr. Vick was one of the most hated athletes to ever too play a sport. If you do not remember, Michael Vick was sentenced to prison for 21 months for felony charges from dog fighting. I guess hell must have froze over because he is heading towards the finish line, while the rest of the football league is still stuck tying their shoes. Vick did the unthinkable Monday night, November 15th, 2010 when he thew four touchdowns and running in for two more. Not throwing an interception, winning football games and breaking records what else do you need to know to make you say he is having a successful season. But wait, do not forget the time he spent in prison, all the dogs he killed for pleasure, the bankruptcy, the criticisms, and the enemies. Mr. Vick, sorry to say it but you are the true definition of a successful failure. NO matter how many accomplishments you achieve the past will still hunt you. In my opinion it REALLY sucks to be you. I wonder does he have more fans then enemies? PSSH what am i thinking, of course more enemies. People only ride the bandwagon of a winner and since I do not see him flaunting a championship ring, those enemies and haters will continue to pile up over the accomplishments he makes. Sorry dawg (oops, that word. I forgot that fast), your still a Successful Failure. P.S. in all of the other post I have pictures of everyone crying to show how they feel to being called a successful failure. But of course Michael Vick would be the unemotional one. Being that Vick is from the hood, this is how he cries